Pura Vida!

Pura Vida! Pure life, full of life, this is living, real living. Costa Rica breathes out this cultural phrase every single moment. I've only been here a few days and I have already seen Costa Ricans (and even some travelers and tourists) carry this with them, presenting it to all. It's such a simple idea and concept and one I was excited about experiencing.

It's used as a phrase, greeting, or just something to say when the time is right. It's kind of like saying "Go Dawgs" but does not have to be summoned by a big win. Here, everyone is a victor of some kind. A warmth circulates throughout this wonderful country and there is nothing you can do to prevent it from reaching you.

Student Union porch

I will be studying Creative Writing and Photodocumentary in this wonderful country for about the next month or so and only hope that pura vida becomes a part of my body to a degree which I cannot ever remove it. Purity goes further than life in Costa Rica. Pure action, word, deed, thought, practice, love, and living are all encouraged and carried out all in these words. 

Sure, we can look at this as a cliche way of saying that we need to strip ourselves of impurities and focus on nature and what is important. I'm not condemning that in any way. Honestly, I don't think we should be solely one material, idea, or substance.  I don't like being put in a box. But once we find something to be passionate about or something to have faith in whether it's conservation, Jesus, friendships, or anything else under the sun -- that is what needs to become pure. Stick to your guns. Be confident with who you are. Don't get FOMO. Even be inconsistent if that means you are staying pure to yourself and what you believe in. 

Perhaps pura vida is not quite a simple phrase then. To me, it does not mean to hone in one specific thing and let that create or shape your purity, it means to live well and to love well without relinquishing fragments of who you are. Live a life of selflessness and ambition, pride and humility, mixture and purity. 

PURA VIDA!

More to come later!

Feeling Weak?

As the chaplain for Chi O, each week I give a short devotion either in chapter or over the listserv. It's a great way to spread God's love for us. I thought it would be cool to start writing them on here, in hopes that people could read them? We'll see how that goes! Here it is:

As spring break is approaching and seems to be close we can almost touch the warm sand, it's left me in a bit of a rut. Obviously we all have midterms, papers, projects, and who knows what else. I've been trying to read this stupid James Joyce book "Ulysses" that makes ZERO sense and feels like this dude woke up in the middle of the night and recorded what he dreamed about. That's left me feeling pretty discouraged. (Speaking of, if any of y'all have read this book, plz hmu.) So yeah school is laborious and utterly unrewarding (at least at this point).

Then you have alllllll the other stuff that goes on. For me, the future came pounding on my door, totally unannounced, just to see what plans (if any) I had swimming around in my head. Then of course I felt overwhelmed because I still don't know what I'm doing this summer or if I should go to graduate school or if I should start with 15 or 30 SPF next week on the beach. (Let's be real, I should probably be wearing like 100.)

I'll be honest, I put a lot of pressure on myself as well. To have stellar grades, to be a solid friend, good role model, aspiring teacher, the list definitely goes on. I strive for perfection which we all know is unattainable, yet I still can't figure out why I attempt to get there. I rely on myself too much. I think I can do it because I'm strong and independent.

Here's the truth: I can't. I can't do it on my own. Not at all. So what do I do when I feel this weak, this defeated, this beaten down? Well today, I curled up in my bed paralyzed by period cramps with Wheat Thins, watched too much Scandal, then turned on Ellen, and proceeded to fall asleep in the first three minutes of Dr. Phil. Honestly, none of that really helped.

It's okay for me to be weak. It's okay for any of us to be weak and feel down. It's inevitable. Here's the thing, our weakness is how God's strength is shown because through him and our reliance on him, His power is made perfect. Others can see that even though we are weak, we are strong because of God and His love for us and His compassion for us. He takes care of us...if we let him. Once we allow him to intervene, we are set free and we are anything but defeated. It takes that moment to extinguish our own pride and independence, and once that moment has happened, his love swoops in and saves us from that weak, dark, defeated place.

I know this was a long rant, so I hope it made sense and you got a little something out of it. Here's the passage I thought of:

"I was given a thorn in my flesh, to torment. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."
2 Corinthians 12:7-10

I encourage you all to read that a few times this week (or whenever) as you might be feeling a little down or a little weak. Take a second to breathe and let go of bad thoughts and vibes inside of you. Make room for God to step in and ask for help. Ask for his help, your friend's help, your family's. It's amazing how you will feel after taking that leap of faith. We are made strong through our weaknesses.

Hoppin' Around

Okay, yep. It's definitely been about year since I last ventured on to my little blog here. Whoops? Not really though because this is my blog and no one reads it anyway. Anywho, I want to blurb about fears.

As illegitimate as this sounds, my greatest fears are clowns, the Easter bunny, mascots, masks, the Muppets, and some dolls. Basically anything that has a predetermined facial expression. Clowns and the Easter bunny are probably the greatest fear. I totally get how stupid that sounds, but I think it's weird that people are afraid of heights or spiders sooooo, there's that....

People are aware of my fear and love posting scary pictures of clowns on my Facebook wall or scaring me with masks and stuff. Real cool guys....

A few weeks ago, we had an "Anything But Clothes" (ABC) social. I was super pumped about it because people think of the most clever things to dress up as. Earlier in the week, it dawned on me. There was something in the Chi O attic that was completely and utterly perfect for the social's theme. This costume.....

 

I know what you're thinking.....why the heck would I dress up as my #1 fear? That's what I thought too. But then it occurred to me that I would never actually have to look at myself, so I could literally become my fear. Kind of an inception concept. I did forget how scary I looked a few times and made myself jump when I went to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. But that's irrelevant. 

I walked around the fraternity house completely silent, just creeping on everyone possible. It was seriously the most fun I had in a long time. I didn't care what people were thinking because they didn't know who I was! Some people were really frustrated and kept attempting to reveal my identity which was seriously so annoying, but they were never successful so ha! Bunny wins. 

Okay, so aside from freaking out on a few occasions when I saw myself in a reflection, throughout the night I became more accustomed to the fact that I was the frightening over-sized bunny walking on two legs with a massive head and very screwed up nose. Many, MANY photo-ops were in order and I literally haven't taken that many pictures since my prom picture party senior year. It was humorous to me because people would say, "Bunnyyy! Can we PLEASE have a picture with you?!" Keep in mind, NO ONE could hear anything I was saying so I had to use nonverbal communication like hand gestures and nods. That was also hilarious because people just assumed that I couldn't hear them so then they would start communicating with their hands instead of their words and I would just stand there slightly baffled, but also smirking to myself at the situation which also no one saw because my face was in a huge rabbit hole...I mean head. (pun intended?) Anyway, back to my point, there were millions of pictures of me in this costume, so I had to adjust to the fact that I was going to see an Easter bunny over and over again. I guess it was comforting that I knew who it was in the suit, but I can't be for sure that my fears are completely diminished......

Here's the thing. Pretty much every fear I had of the Easter bunny before this night was reconfirmed as a fear of mine after this night. I don't like mascots or the Easter bunny because you never know who's inside. It could be a man, woman, small child....you would never know. Also, the expression stays the same. In my case, I was always smiling in a partially creepy way with a discolored nose. I realized how much I use my facial expression to convey what I'm trying to say. Everyone thought I was just smiling or laughing at their jokes! I couldn't show them that I was confused, scared, or shocked, or anything else! That freaks me out about mascots. I realized how easy it is to be creepy when you're in one of those suits and how much fun it is. Needless to say, I haven't quite overcome this fear completely, but I definitely made some headway. I'm pretty proud of myself. 

There were many amazing moments throughout the night, but one of my personal favorites was the ride from the house to the social downtown. Naturally, I rode in the back of a pick-up truck.

I didn't last quite long into the night, mainly because I started getting harassed by drunk people. Not cool. There's something about a bunny downtown that either really intrigued people or freaked them out. Regardless, I still had the time of my life and ended the night hopping across the crosswalk to get in my friend's car to go home. BUNNY OUT.

Fall into Motion

Happy November! What a great month...we're in the midst of fall, Thanksgiving is soon, and November recognizes lots and lots of causes and holidays. It's Native American Heritage Month, Pancreatic Cancer Month (which leads to "No Shave November"), National Novel Writing Month, Alzheimer's Disease Awareness Month, National Homeless Youth Month, National Pomegranate Month, and International Drum Month. Just to name like...seven.

Fall is obviously amazing. I mean the leaves, the smells, the weather, the pumpkins, the preparation for winter, Halloween, Thanksgiving.

It's all a grand ole time. Fall is also really crazy and hectic. I don't know about you, but for me November in a way is like some kind of time warp. It becomes so easy for priorities to get all messed up. There's always so much to do and no time. It feels like you're spinning out of motion. Movement is good, but uncontrolled movement can be detrimental to your self.

What I have to constantly remind myself is to slow down and take a step back. I'm not saying slow down forever - the pace of your life is obviously up to you. But there is a need for

calming down, going into a quiet place, and refilling your soul.

Quiet time with Jesus every day literally equips me for the day. Only God knows what I need for that day and spending time with Him and in His Word is the only way to see that.

Spending time in Creation rejuvenates my spirit while giving me rest and peace. Appreciation and wonder stem from nature and what God has graced us with.

Looking into my own heart to find out the person I am acting like. Sometimes, I find good things and am grateful. Other times I look at my heart and am disgusted. My relationship with God, my friendships, and what I am giving out are all carefully analyzed.

I have to get back on track. All of those church sermons, Bible study lessons, Crossroads talks, and devotionals....where have they gone? Do they remain in my journal or in my brain, only there to look back on to refresh my mind? Or do they remain eternally in my heart and soul, actually changing my life, my character, and my faith? My prayer is that it's the latter.

This notion of "falling back into the motion" is probably overrated and pretty cliche. But honestly, it's so important. The ups and downs of life definitely make this difficult. I know it's not easy. All I know is that I'm sick of having a kind of roller coaster life in regards to the goodness of my soul. Instead of changing my attitudes for a summer, a few weeks, or the beginning of fall, I want to change my LIFE, my PERSPECTIVE, and my ACTIONS.

Keep your eyes sharpened, ears ready, and heart open. Stay excellent.

"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them rubbish that I may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ - the righteousness that comes form God and is by faith."

-Philippians 3:7-9

A Flower of Love

Lately my dad has been sending a bit of beauty via text message every day. He sends a picture of this natural beauty to my two sisters, my mom, and me. Usually with a sweet caption like "TGIF!" or "A most wonderful day to you all, with love." And my personal favorite which was actually today's... "Have a blessed Sunday. Know that you are loved by God and me." They are his way of sending us warmth and a smile. These little pick-me-ups are something so simple as a flower. Yes...he sends us pictures of flowers. How girly am I that I LOVE it?! I'll just say that it's more of my nature girl/crunchy side that loves these images...for the record.

They may not be the real thing but they're still pretty AND it's the thought that counts. I mean, let's face it..I KNOW dad loves me. But the fact that he has put actions to his love means so much more. It shows me that he is thinking of me and that he cares about my day. Wow, this is sounding cheesy. My point is that our love for others shouldn't just be verbal. We should be LIVING it out! It should be a part of who we are in the grandest capacity. Because we have love in our hearts, others should see it BURSTING from us.

Of course, there are many ways to show this love. One being sending your family an uplifting message and a beautiful flower to go with it. But don't be confined to this way or one other way that gets the "job done." Express yourself and your love in the best way you know how. Learn their love language (http://www.5lovelanguages.com/learn-the-languages/the-five-love-languages/). Make them smile. Give them a hug. Did you know that you need 12 hugs a day to be emotionally satisfied? Don't believe me? Get 12 hugs tomorrow and see how you feel. You'll know.

Okay, so I might have gotten of track. This probably comes off as cliche...which is kinda true. But cliches and cliches because they are correct! You never know how far some words of encouragement can go. And you never know how much a picture will mean...after all a picture is worth a thousand words.

As The Beatles so nicely put it...
"Love is all you need."

A Consistent Inconsistency of Absence

I am a failure at blogging. It's been over a year since my last post...oooops?! But honestly, I don't think anyone missed me. I only have two followers...so yeah sorry to you two. Actually, I changed my mind...I'm not a failure at blogging. I think my desire to blog comes and goes. Even though I wish I had this desire to blog every day because I really do love it, I don't. It's like the waves in the ocean. The water is always there, but the waves come and go. That sounds lame. But my point is that I'm not going to write meaningless things just so I can have tons of posts.


"There is consistency in inconsistency if you are staying true to yourself."


Love that. A good friend told me that one day. It took me a while to understand it, but when I did I was like..dang! that is so freaking true! So basically, if you're staying true to yourself, it's okay for your life to be inconsistent. If you're a runner and one day you just don't feel like running - don't. If you're a painter and one day you want to draw - draw. If you're a writer and one day you feel like putting the pen away - read.

I don't know what got me back here typing a new post. It might have been because I found two of my friends' blogs and missed my own. I don't know..but who cares anyway. I'M BAAAACKKK! What to catch you up on...hmmm.

my family went to Arizona over Christmas...

...visited the Grand Canyon...so vast!!!

went on a hike...


...enjoyed some scenery
(I think this looks likes what Mt. Sinai could have looked like)


...and of course saw cactus!

Arizona holds something special in my heart. Experiencing Christmas there was amazing. My time there was spent celebrating and growing. I came through to the New Year with new perspective and an overall warmth. God's timing is, of course, perfect.

the New Year came about...

I started the New Year out with some pretty good resolutions. One of them being to floss everyday. I was so sick of the dentist asking if I had been flossing and then lecturing me about how I'll die if I don't. But now I realize that there actually are some possible health risks that can turn into something really serious. I haven't missed but like two days flossing.

my school took about 20 seniors to Peru over spring break...


to serve the local community...



to do some touristy sightseeing..(Machu Picchu!!!)

..and of course to enjoy the scenery!

This trip was a really good combination of service, cultural exposure, and togetherness. We had the opportunity to paint, build, and also play with Peruvian kids. Peru is such a warm country. There is so much to learn from other cultures. And so much to learn from each other.

I got a puppy!!! This is Mae and she's a rescue and is absolutely amazing and my obsession :)

she loves nature...

GRADUATED FROM HIGH SCHOOL!!! woo

went to the beach with friends after graduation..


..to listen to some AWESOME music at hangout


saw some sick shows!



met some random people. made friends...

and simply "hungout"

Hangout was the EPITOME of what music festivals represent. It was an perfect combination and mixture of listening to live music, experiencing encounters with strangers, and...well, hanging out (onnn the beeeach)! Music is one of my obsessions - passions (for a proper word). I find that when you listen to music, it can take you places you can't go otherwise. It transports me to a place of freedom, clarity, inspiration and contentment. Sometimes, I feel like it's unexplainable. All of you who have been to concerts/shows know (hopefully) what I mean. If you haven't been to a concert before, the only thing I have to say is GO.

In June, I spent nearly a month in Colorado doing work crew for YoungLife at a camp called Frontier Ranch.

My job was "server"..we set the tables in the Dining Hall....

served the campers food

..and bussed their tables

the last night, we set up "the longest table you've ever seen" and the campers ate an awesome dinner. this idea was created at Frontier because this is one of the closest pictures to heaven we have. it says in the Bible that there's a long table where everyone eats together. we came close.


during work crew, not only did I further my relationship with the Lord, but I also made friends with the most amazing people...


we devoured YL's signature dessert "Train Wreck" together..


took a morning hike to the crosses..


..watched God bring up the sun



and sang a song at sunrise

and..as usual were surrounded by this kind of amazing scenery, never got used to it, and always enjoyed it

Here's a better (but not the best because it's difficult to put into words) description of work crew...YoungLife has camps all over the country that are for mostly high school, but sometimes middle school, kids. During the summer, they come with their area for one week to one of the several camps. The camp is run by the full-time staff, year-long interns, summer interns, summer staff, and work crew. The summer staff is for college students, and work crew for high schoolers. It's completely volunteer. But honestly, I feel so lucky. I feel like I should have paid them to get me there. I got to spend almost a month serving the Lord and the campers! And I grew deeper in my faith and formed relationships with both the campers, fellow work crewers and summer staffers. I am so happy and fortunate that I was a part of work crew. A part of something amazing and special. I was a part of teenagers COMING HOME TO THE FATHER! Magical. As you can probably guess, I learned a lot. Power of prayer. Supernatural strength. Jesus. Appreciation. Listening to the Holy Spirit. Seeing God. Oh, and so much more...

"For even the Son on Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as ransom for many." -Mark 10:45

I went backpacking again in the Smoky's with my cousin, two uncles and dad...

...and it was awesome.

then we arrived to our family reunion three days (via foot!) later to hang with fam!
(these are just a few of us...there's actually 20+ of us)

and now...i'm in COLLEGE!!! woo

More updates about college and such...I promise. OHH and I will soon post my fave music from the past like year or however long I didn't blog...get exxxcited

Visualize Your Life

Everyone knows iTunes. Well, I hope everyone knows iTunes. There's so much magic in iTunes. Not only do they have totally sweet commercials. Those dancer people make me so envious because I'll never have moves like them. HOWEVER, I totally rock out to music like they do. But anyway, back to magic. iTunes brings music first and foremost, which of course I think is quite magical. But what's perhaps even more magical than that is a little thing called iTunes Visualizer. Heard of it? Play a song on your iTunes, then hit ctrl (or command if you're a mac) T. Step 2 - ctrl F.

WOW! It's like shooting stars all over your computer screen!!!!!!! The best is when you can put it on a big screen. That's freakin' cool. I could seriously stare at that thing for hours. It is so calming and just captures your mind. I think it's because the pretty lights usually match the beat to the music, so you just can't look away. "Cosmic Love" by Florence + The Machine is insanely cool and totally matches the song and the lyrics too because she talks about the stars and moon and stuff. Listen to it at the bottom and then go see for your self....LITERALLY.

picture via www.imamuseum.org

I don't really even know why I decided to blog about this. I just felt like I hadn't blogged in a while and my visualizer was going and I was like, "WOWWW. I'm still soooo intrigued. I gotta let someone know."

The lights remind me of lots of things. I mean you got the star and space thing going. And you got the whole silent fireworks idea (except they're not really silent because you have music playing, but you know what I mean).

For me, it's really cool how I can finally associate an image with my favorite songs, especially since I'm a visual person. I think sometimes that songs are just to great for images or videos and lots of times their music videos just do not live up to what the song means or represents, but with the visualizer, it's totally up to interpretation. Just like songs are and the lyrics to that song. So really it's a perfect match. They really are a great pair together. Some philosophical moments could definitely come from watching the visualizer for just 2 minutes.

So I guess the "bigger picture" to this totally random post would be that you should visualize your life. And everything it in. Start making images to go with everything. And when I say images, I don't mean drop everything and become an artist. I mean, like, to start associating concepts with other concepts, ideas, or beliefs. Start connecting them to the bigger things in life. Visualize them so they can be interpreted by you or others.

And then when YOUR head starts spinning from all this, just turn the visualizer back on. It'll calm you back down and chill you out for a good while.

I'll Be Seein' You, Summer

Summer. It came and now it's gone. And as usual, it felt way too fast. Don't know about you, but I had an amazing summer. One of the best so far. Probably why I never bothered to sit down and blog about it. I was either to busy watching the sunrise at "Pretty Place" . . .


. . . Or maybe I was too busy being a camp counselor for four weeks, learning many, many important and valuable life lessons. And oh yeah, washing the dishes for the whole camp. We only ran into a few problems...like the Hobart exploding with soap.



The majority of my summer was spent in North Carolina, which has always been one of my favorite states. But now, I realize that it's probably the most underrated state out of all fifty. During one of my backpacking trips this summer (up in the Smoky Mountains), we summited Mt. Sterling. At the top, there was an old fire tower that my cousin and I climbed up to. We actually played cards up there and witnessed one of the most beautiful sunsets I've ever seen.



From that sunset, our group backpacked for a few more days to our family reunion, also in the Smoky Mountains. We felt very proud to say that we arrived to the ranch where we were staying "via foot". Once again, I was surrounded by North Carolina's natural beauty. Something that I miss and really long for, living in the city.


Summer seems to be a time when lessons shower down. Sometimes we don't really feel that rain. But I know I did this year. For sure. And I am so happy and so blessed that I learned the lessons I did and made the realizations I did. God really put me in a cool place this summer and I just feel so fortunate.
It's also really important that after this rain has fallen, we look for the rainbow. And never associate rain to be a negative thing either. I mean, come on, have you ever danced in the rain? Or just stood there and felt the drops pour down on your skin? Cool feeling. Woah, getting off track. Rainbows. So, they are a pretty cool thing. To me, it's like that think in the sky that sometimes you see, if you're lucky. They don't last long, only a few minutes. This completely relates to summer and the growth that happens, at least in my past experiences. Whenever I have a summer that was . . . let's say, eye-opening or showed me a different perspective, or maybe I went on a retreat and had a really great ah-ha moment, right after I get back or soon after, those feelings and what I learned disappear, just like the rainbow.

That all being said, keeping the rainbow is one of my biggest goals for this year. Because believe me, what I learned this summer are things that I really do not want to forget.