For me, not for you

"It is better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self." - Cyril Connolly

I heard this about a week ago and it spoke volumes to me. I've been struggling a lot lately with writing. I don't really have motivation anymore. I'm on the school newspaper and I write articles a lot. I don't want to speak highly of myself, but I do a pretty good job of working hard and producing a good amount of articles that are of what I think is decent quality. Anyway, probably 1% of the students read the articles. Some, not all, of the teachers read them, which is nice. But man, it's so annoying. I get really bogged down about it. I literally feel like I'm writing for nothing and I have no reason to be in the class or on the staff. Sounds pretty sad, right? Or maybe a little dramatic? Yeah, I think so too. But it's just frustrating to work really hard and not really get the pat on the back for your toils. But perhaps I'm being selfish...

So when I read this quotation by Connolly, I thought, Oops. I think I messed up. And it's true. My focus was not on what mattered. It's been very hard to write when I have the "public" in mind. It's been hard to write when all I can think about is others opinions and if it'll be 'good enough' to them. Now I've realized that I've lost part of myself. I've lost the truth I once carried. Pretty freaky. But that's what you get for caring too much about what other people think.



It's funny, I've heard that you should never care what others think all my life. And I'm sure we all have. And I've never really considered myself to be that type of person, but I am. I've just cared in a way that is much different from what I originally thought. It doesn't have to be about clothes, looks, taste in music, and stuff like that. I think this 'issue' comes in many different shapes and sizes. BUT, the main point is that we're not staying true to ourselves. We all have a story, and we're letting someone else have the pen to write it on OUR paper. Not cool.

And if you think about it, it's all in our society. We tip-toe around everything just to make sure that we're not going to reveal too much or too little in order to feel accepted. Acceptance. That's a big one. We all want to be accepted. I mean, that's fair. But I think sometimes (okay, maybe A LOT of the time), we look in the wrong places to be accepted. If every single person accepted everyone, there would be harmony on this earth. And if that ever happens, there will be a party at my house! But let's face it, in this life on earth, it's probably not going to happen. So, we just have to face the tough fact that there will be people who are going to look at us like we have two heads. But you know, it's their loss. Whatever, to them. I'm not saying to blow everyone off and be all "I'm cool. HERE I AM." That's definitely NOT the point. The point is to go through each day with grace, strength, courage, confidence, and humility so you can show everyone who you are.

One Day Without Shoes

Today is TOMS' "One Day Without Shoes" and I am proud to be a supporter of it!! If you don't know what TOMS is, check out their website here. But to make a long story short, TOMS is a shoe company that sells some pretty unique shoes. For each pair of shoes you buy, they send a pair to a child in need. They call this their "One for One" movement. It's a really great cause and has helped many children in countries like Argentina, Ethiopia, South Africa, and even the United States.

But anyway, getting to today!! TOMS created this "One Day Without Shoes" in order to spread awareness for the cause and the impact just a pair of shoes can have on a child's life. To me, this day is to also realize the importance of owning a pair of shoes - or in our case, way more than one pair. Here are some facts straight from the TOMS website:

* In some developing nations, children must walk for miles to school, clean water and to seek medical help.
* Cuts and sores on feet can lead to serious infection.
* Often, children cannot attend school barefoot.
* In Ethiopia, approximately one million people are suffering from Podoconiosis, a debilitating and disfiguring disease caused by walking barefoot in volcanic soil.
* Podoconiosis is 100% preventable with basic foot hygiene and wearing shoes.




The point is to go the day barefoot. Maybe you can't go the WHOLE day, but you can definitely try for a few hours, just a few minutes, or even a few seconds. A bunch of us at school today tried to support the cause, and the administration shut us down pretty darn quickly. But fortunately, I (and I think a few others) were able to kick our shoes off in a few classes when no one was looking :)

In my eyes, a day like this is the start. Just the beginning. It's the beginning to a change and a movement that will hopefully spread across the nation and across the world. We have the power to send people a message, anyone does. All you really have to do is believe in something with all of you, everything in you, your whole heart. Once you have that full belief, you just have to find a way to spread it (in a loving way of course). I mean think about it, how many crazy looks do you think I got at school during the moments when I was barefoot? And how many people do you think asked me what I was doing? Let's just say more than a few. When you do something like that, when you stand up for something, and be a part of a movement, people ask. People want to know why you're CHOOSING to go barefoot.

This really made me think (again) about how much power we really do have. We just have power in our voice. It makes me think about how many different causes there are out there. It makes me think about how many things we can be a part of - whether we start them or whether we just begin to follow the movement. It makes me think of how big this world and how small I am.

It makes me think of the song "I Need to Wake Up" by Melissa Etheridge. Although this song was in the movie "An Inconvenient Truth" (I think...I haven't seen it so I wouldn't really know), that's not where my point is going. The lyrics in this song really speak the truth. The one line I want to share that goes well with all of this is "I need to speak out, something's got to break up. I've been asleep and I need to wake up now."

It's as simple as that. Speaking out doesn't always mean using your voice either. I believe you can speak out with actions. Don't forget that saying, "Actions speak louder than words." We can speak out in silence. We can speak out in so many different ways.

There are so many ways we can help the world and so many things we can do to try to make it better. They can be small or big. Either way, let's start. Say with...going barefoot?

photo via TOMS site

Turn off your stereo, radio, video, i don't know . . .

As I was studying for an environmental science test over the weekend, I came across an interesting fact. Noise. If you think about it, there's noise all around us. There aren't really moments when it's completely quite and peaceful. Anyway, in my textbook, they actually referred to it as "noise pollution" -- how interesting. This basically includes police sirens, car horns and engines, city noises, displeasing human, animal or machine-created sounds that disrupt the activity or balance of human or animal life. Another fact I learned was that the word 'noise' is derived from the Latin word 'nausea' meaning sickness. Hmmm, makes you think.

As I read further, I learned that noise pollutions actually impacts the health of humans! First of all, you can essentially lose part of your hearing. But this noise can also have an effect on other physical aspects of your life and on your psychological health. It can raise your blood pressure which can eventually cause heart disease! This excess noise also can cause aggression and annoyance. In other words, you could be going to anger management just because you're living in the city or in some place with a lot of noise pollution. Crazy right?

When i read this, I just thought, wow. Noise is impacting our personalities and way of life. But it made a lot of sense to me. I'm not a fan of the city noises, especially if I'm falling asleep or something. I think we really do need times when we just sit in complete and utter silence. Ultimate tranquility. I would love nothing more than to sit in the woods just listening to the natural noises out there. That's no noise pollution. To me, that is sheer happiness, peace, and contentment. Noise pollution is the reason I have a sound machine. So when there are nights when I can't fall asleep because the city won't close its mouth, I can escape to a quite summer night in the country, the tropical rain forest, the ocean, or a majestic waterfall, and that will calm my restless body.

I was in the car, listening to music, and I wondered if music would be considered noise pollution. Still not sure. Regardless, the song that came to mind was "Adding to the Noise" by Switchfoot. One line in the chorus goes likes this, "If we're adding to the noise, turn off this song." The rest of the song is awesome, as well as the lyrics.

After learning that there are also physical impacts from noise pollution and not just the possibility of losing my sanity, I'm definitely seeking out more ways to find more relaxed, harmonious, and QUIET moments in my life. You'll probably find me in the woods somewhere, meditating or something, happy as can be, with a really low blood pressure!


**Oh, and since I couldn't add "Adding to the Noise" to my playlist (since it's not that popular), here's a link to the song.

MOVE . . . THAT . . . ROCK

*Just an FYI: I was going to post this on the actual day of Easter, but because I was coming back from out of town, the Monday after, (past 1 AM) just had to do.*

I have always loved the show Extreme Makeover: Home Edition that airs on ABC. I used to watch all the time. It was such a heart-warming show. Plus, Ty Pennington is wonderful. Anyway, one of my favorite parts, probably what I looked forward to the most, was the part when the family got out of the limo and stood behind the bus. They were all so eager to see what was behind that Greyhound (or whatever it was). They had waited so long and endured so much adversity. Then the family, along with the community, says, "MOVE THAT BUS!" With that, the bus is moved and the family is relieved. It's moving to watch.

This reminds me a lot of Easter in a way. As Christians, or simply just people, we wait and wait through the tough situations life throws at us. Sometimes we feel like we can't go through what we've been given. For me, I know that there have been times when I have simply lost hope. The feelings of sadness, anger, and disbelief cover up the feelings of joy, peace, and hope. However, it is through Easter that I am reminded that the trials I go through are never everlasting. What is everlasting is the light and life from Christ. By moving the rock away from the tomb, the feelings of sadness shall be gone. Darkness shall be gone. Joy and light shall reign forever. Hope is restored.




Lots of times we forget the significance of this rock. To me, it's a reminder that through Christ we can overcome ANYTHING. We can even essentially overcome death in a sense. I mean, He proved that one! So in my life, I am so glad that Jesus or the Lord or whomever said, "MOVE THAT ROCK!"